The True North of Leadership: Are Your Actions Telling the Right Story?

In the demanding world of Client Success and Information Systems, we often operate under the conviction that our Strategic Action Plan or our KPI dashboard defines our success. We push our teams to do more, implement faster, and achieve higher numbers. But what if the most powerful force shaping your leadership legacy—and the loyalty of your team—isn’t what you do, but something far more foundational? Are you leading your organization based on what you love more than what you know?

The Unseen Anchor of Leadership

The technical marketplace is a crucible of urgency. Whether rolling out a complex digital transformation initiative or fighting to preserve a critical client relationship, the pressure to execute is immense. We rightfully focus on metrics, governance, and effective workflow. Yet, for leaders operating at the VP and C-Suite levels in SMB and mid-market companies, the difference between transactional management and transformative leadership often comes down to an internal, often neglected quality.

Centuries ago, Augustine Aurelius distilled a profound truth about human character that holds immense resonance for today’s executive:

“We are shaped most by what we think, not by what we do, but by what we love. For when we ask whether somebody is a good person, we are not asking what he believes or hopes for, but what he loves.” (Augustine Aurelius, De Trinitate, Book IX)

This statement is not merely philosophical; it is a critical strategic insight. In the context of leadership, what you love—what you value, prioritize, and genuinely care about—serves as the unseen anchor that determines your decisions, your relational style, and the ultimate health of your organization.

The Strategic Alignment of Affection

For the leader in Client Success (CSM) or Information Systems (IS/IT), what does it mean to be judged by what you love?

1. The Love of the Mission Over the Method

Many experienced technical leaders know they should prioritize the client experience or system reliability. But if your deepest affection is rooted in the perfection of the method (e.g., maintaining rigid legacy processes, proving the technical superiority of a chosen stack, or protecting a departmental budget), your leadership will be rigid.

Challenge for You: When facing a critical decision—be it a system overhaul or a client escalation—where does your attention land first? On preserving your operational comfort, or on the success of the outcome for the organization and the client? Your genuine love for the mission (delivering value, enabling the business, upholding integrity) must supersede your attachment to the process.

2. The Love of People Over Productivity

In technology, it is easy to view engineers, CSMs, and specialists as highly effective resources to be managed for optimal output. While performance is non-negotiable, a leader whose core love is the well-being and development of the individual will naturally inspire profound commitment.

This is not a soft approach; it is strategic wisdom. When you genuinely love to see your people grow and succeed, you invest time in mentoring, you offer constructive correction, and you advocate for their future. This leadership style is felt—it creates loyalty, reduces costly churn in specialized roles, and fosters a culture of mutual respect where people give their best, not just their obligated minimum.

3. The Love of Clarity Over Control

For leaders operating at the top of an organization, the temptation to hoard information and maintain tight control is a constant challenge. However, true strength lies in a love for Clarity—the commitment to transparent, unambiguous communication, even when the news is difficult.

When your primary desire is to maintain Control, you create bottlenecks and breed suspicion. When your true love is for Clarity, you empower your seasoned individual contributors and managers with the context they need to make intelligent, localized decisions. You trust the individuals you hired and align your team to the strategic intent of the organization, freeing your own time for higher-level thinking and external engagement.

The Call to Examine Your Heart’s Motives

The complexity of the SMB and mid-market landscape demands leaders who are not only competent in action but sound in character. Your success is not merely a reflection of the latest quarterly numbers, but a reflection of the deep-seated values you carry into every meeting, negotiation, and one-on-one conversation.

As you step into your next strategic challenge, take a moment to pause and consider the truth of Augustine’s words. Ask yourself: What does my leadership truly love?

The answer will be clearly demonstrated not through your email signature or your formal job description, but through the non-verbal cues your team reads, the decisions you make under pressure, and the loyalty you command when times are difficult. Lead with strategic affection, and watch your organization thrive.

The Unspoken Architecture of Leadership

If you are anything like me, you operate in an industry where precision, logic, and data reign supreme. Every digital transformation roadmap, every critical infrastructure decision, and every budget proposal is meticulously engineered for optimal outcome. Yet, here is the pressing challenge common to every large-scale technology organization: If our strategies are perfectly rational, why do our critical communications—the vendor negotiations, the board presentations, the team-wide pivots—so often fall short of their intended impact?

The truth is, while we focus intensely on what we say, the decisive competitive edge in enterprise leadership is often determined by how we say it and how we show up. The most brilliant strategic vision remains just a document until it is communicated with conviction and received with trust.

This realization led me to Cues: Small Signals, Incredible Impacts by Vanessa Van Edwards. This book is not about mere "soft skills"; it’s a critical read for any senior IT/IS professional who understands that leadership at our level is a high-stakes performance, where the smallest non-verbal signal can either forge trust or introduce crippling doubt.

Here is an executive summary of the cues that resonated most deeply with me and provided direct, actionable insight into elevating our day-to-day engagement with our teams and stakeholders:

Part I: The Strategic Presence – Leveraging "Power Cues"

In the environment of enterprise IT, presence is power—not the power of hierarchy, but the capacity to command attention, articulate certainty, and foster an environment where productive disagreement can thrive, leading to better decisions.

Power Cue #1: Powerful Posture

This is fundamental. Whether you are leading a $100M vendor negotiation or addressing the leadership team after a critical incident, your posture is the first piece of data the room processes. When we are defensive, uncertain, or disengaged, our body language contracts, signals low status, and invites questioning. Powerful Posture—open shoulders, an upright but relaxed frame, and occupying space—communicates competence and resilience. It signals to the room: “I am calm, I am confident, and I am in control of this conversation and the situation at hand.” This is paramount for establishing the psychological safety needed to move complex initiatives forward.

Power Cue #5: Palm Power

Effective leadership demands transparency and a commitment to moving past hidden assumptions. Van Edwards highlights how showing your palms—a gesture historically associated with demonstrating one holds no weapon—is a powerful cue for trust and openness. When you are presenting a solution or asking your team to commit to a difficult initiative, using open-palm gestures makes your delivery appear more honest and authentic. It is a non-verbal confirmation that your motivations are pure and your proposal is well-intended, significantly lowering the audience’s defensive barriers and encouraging buy-in.

Part II: The Vocal Architecture – Mastering "Vocal Cues"

The voice is the delivery mechanism for our strategy, yet many leaders have never truly trained this instrument. Now that remote and hybrid meetings are a constant, the vocal signal is often the only signal we transmit.

Vocal Power Cue #1: How to Sound Confident

Confidence in speech is less about volume and more about control and cadence. Confident speakers avoid "uptalk" (raising the pitch at the end of a statement, turning it into an unintentional question) and utilize strategic pauses. Pausing before a key point not only allows the information to land but also demonstrates self-assurance. It says, “I know what I am about to say is important, and I trust you will wait for it.”

Vocal Power Cue #3: Eliminate Vocal Fry...Forever

While a seemingly minor point, vocal fry (the low, creaky sound at the end of a sentence) disproportionately erodes credibility, particularly in high-stakes environments. It is often perceived, rightly or wrongly, as a sign of apathy, insecurity, or lack of gravitas. As senior leaders, we must be polished communicators. Eliminating this cue ensures that the focus remains on the strategic content and not the vocal distraction.

Vocal Power Cue #4: Volume Control Shows Emotional Control

When under pressure—be it a system outage or a contentious budget review—our natural tendency may be to raise our voice. However, the most emotionally controlled leaders master strategic volume control. A measured, steady volume conveys stability and strategic command. Furthermore, lowering your voice slightly at a critical juncture can force the listener to lean in, capturing their full focus and demonstrating that you are handling the pressure with calm authority.

Vocal Warmth Cue #1: Make a Memorable Vocal First Impression

Warmth is how we build trust. Your vocal first impression should convey that you are not just a technical automaton, but a human leader invested in solving a problem with your audience. This involves using an engaging pitch and a slightly faster-than-average pace to demonstrate enthusiasm, followed by a slight, strategic slowing to ensure clarity and gravity.

Vocal Warmth Cue #3: How to Sound More Interesting

Monotone delivery is the enemy of engagement, particularly when discussing complex technical roadmaps. To sound more interesting, employ vocal variety—changing your pitch, pace, and projection. Emphasize key data points or strategic imperatives with a slight drop in pitch and a deliberate pause. This variation ensures that your audience remains engaged and that your core message penetrates the noise.

The Charismatic Word Choice

Charismatic communication—in both verbal presentations and written executive summaries—is achieved by shifting from technical nomenclature to language that invokes vision and benefit. Instead of focusing on tool names or process steps, focus on the impact to the business, the value created, and the future state you are pursuing. Use powerful, evocative words to frame challenges as opportunities and operational shifts as strategic leaps. This helps you engage your audience not just on a logical level, but on an aspirational one, driving momentum toward organizational goals.

Call to Action

Effective leadership is about maximizing impact through deliberate execution. I highly recommend adding Cues: Small Signals, Incredible Impacts to your reading list. Master these small signals, and you will begin to observe the incredible impact on your ability to lead, persuade, and drive strategic outcomes across the enterprise.